why can't i be dead for a while
gone for a while
stop breathing and stop living the life i live for a while
stop feeling the things i feel, just for a while
because it's becoming so weird
it's becoming more than I can take
this weight on my shoulders is becoming more than i can hold
more than i can ignore more than i can try to hide and fake
that it's just not me when i tell you i'm sad
that it's only me when i'm happy but now i'm glad
i can get this off of my chest because you don't know how i feel
this hurts so fucking bad
don't think i'm lying 'cause you don't know a single thing about me
you just think you do beause i let you think you do,
for you'd just start to feel pity for me when i'd tell you the truth
but that just aint me, i don't want any help
i may be young, but i can stand up for myself
fight my own pain, by myself
and i must admit, run away and hide.. by myself..
i'm not proud of how i try to hide the way i really feel inside,
i'm not ashamed to show you, i'm not afraid to let you know,
but you wouldn't understand because it's so complicated
I don't understand me myself, so how could you?
and it's even more stupid that i'm writing this instead of just telling,
everyone the truth and stop this nonsense and go on with my life
my messed up life, that's what it was, still is, and always will be,
and there is nothing that can change that
not even me, but if i could,
i would..