I'm so confused,
so lost...
I'm not myself anymore.
every street,
every place where I am.
I could only see happy people smiling and laughing,
but than,
look at me...
I'm so tired,
I'm not hopefull anymore.
sometimes I wish myself gone,
forever!!!
It's not funny anymore.
I tryed so hard to laugh,
so people saw that I'm happy.
But it isn't true,
I'm always depressed.
Not that I would that!!!
I don't know anymore what it is
for been happy.
I don't understand myself.
My whole life a mizzery!!!
If this is life,
than I don't know anymore why to live forder.
Death spokes always in my mind,
it's a opsession,
just like food
and it wound't go away...
If I try to kill myself to feel pain ans
see the bleed streaming of my skin,
that's one thing that I think is good...
Maybe it isn't,
but I still go forder untill it is to for,
deep enough to feel it bleeds.
Than I will be death...,
lost forever...