Daughter 2 Father

A part of me is dying
As i grow older
I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders
Cuz’ I was just a toddler
I wait for the good Lord to make me feel better
Everyday hoping for a letter
Waiting for you to pick up the pieces
As my heart freezes
Daddy to hold me, that was what I needed

I’m ok now, but I still want to meet you
I have another father-figure in my life, I don’t know if he looks like you
Sometimes I want to hate you
And scream at you
And other times I just want to hold your hand
I don’t know you, but I still want to
I’m always asking myself the same questions, why don’t you contact me?
Don’t you love me, don’t you wanna be with me?

Then I lie and convince myself, I never missed you
And I’m still fine after those 12 years without you
I CAN handle it alone
You have your own home

But when I’m alone I have to face the truth
I felt pretty damn alone, through my youth
I cry and ask what’s wrong with me?
Why doesn’t he want me?
Did he ever loved me?

With a head full of questions, I cry myself to sleep…