I'm so tired

Tired of this non-life
Tired of waiting
For good things to come
For bad things to go away

I'm so tired

Of waiting for you to make up your mind
Of knowing what the answer will be
But just not yet

Hoping

Hoping for the better life
Hoping
Dreaming
Of never waking up
To sleep
The easiest way of being
Snoring softly
Like an ocean's breeze
To sleep
To die
To be
Nothing but you
Me
Me
I'm me
Not you
Not we
Just me

Me
I am
I live
I crie
I die
But I am
And I stay
Yes, I'm a stubborn bitch
But you won't get ris of me that easily

We were as one
No, not true
We only thought we were
But it felt right
Just right
And it was
Back then
It still does
For me
But not for you

I don't understand
I don't want to understand
You know that
So you won't explain
Please tell me
Please
I need to know
I want
Not
Need
Just do it
Tell me
Torture me
Kill me
I don't care
Just don't
Tell me
You love me
I can do nothing with that
Anyway
I know
Don't tell me
I know

Why do you have that big stamp on your forehead
Why does it say gay
It should say I love who I love
No matter who
Him
Me
Why this confusion
Why
O
Why
This madness

It used to be so simple
It was what it was
And it smelled like more
But we both knew
It was what it was
And it would always just be that

But now
Only now
It became forbidden
Wrong
Secret
Pain
And suddenly
A possibility

Why
O
Why
Do you crie behind my back
Look in my eyes
See what you once saw
Do what you once did
And crie
Please crie
Just for me
With me
Let us make rivers together
Let's build a dream
Where beavers live in trees
And birds all sing our song
De wereld is Utopia
We thought
But I knew it wasn't true
I was never able to build a decent dream
Cause dreaming is a priveledge
Only for those who will be waking up the next morning