I sit here as my mind is slowly fading
Descending a shaft that never stops hading.
For a spell I stare up into the sky,
Long having forgotten how to fly.
Since long I have lost my wings
And with them so many other things.
If only I could rewind
To a time ere I ‘came blind.
But alas I cannot go back;
Here I’m forever tied to this rack.

Where can I find my cure,
If to this bane I cannot inure?
To desperation I have clung,
As my death’s keen was sung.
I can still hear death’s call,
Bidding me to end it all.

To what end must I endure this pain?
What tells me that it will not be in vain?
Now inside everything is hollow:
For my soul has sunk into the dark below.
And in anguish my spirit is ever sighing,
As inside all hope is slowly dying.

Within me all strength fades,
As I await my death for decades.
Fear is all I have left,
All else taken by fate’s theft.
Nothing now remains of my soul,
For it destiny long ago stole.
Soon everything will be erased;
The oblivion of nonbeing embraced.

Soon all will be gone,
And everything will be undone.
Soon my spirit will have vanished,
All faith forever banished.
From within all starts to leak,
As I slowly become frail and weak.
Soon I can no longer return;
For all has already begun to burn.

What’s happened to me?
Why must this pain be?
Why am I so woebegone,
While all joy and happiness are gone?
All my dreams are blown away,
As night puts an end to day.
For I am afflicted by a disease most maleficent;
An illness that robs me of all sentiment.

Is there any feeling inside my soul,
That by grief has not been made foul?
The very thought makes me reel,
But it seems that I can no longer feel.
If I could tear open my own spirit,
Would there be anything to be found in it?
What would I find but a bottomless pit?
Is even the smallest flame in my heart still lit?

Even the solace of grief seems to seep;
For I find that I cannot even weep,
But in the darkest night,
My heart taken over by this blight,
It all comes to much to bear;
Within I feel my soul sear,
And in deep terror I hyperventilate,
As my heart throbs with fear and hate.

Into the darkness of the abyss I sink;
As I soon become unable to even think.
Inside me my inner self tears.
Perishing with screams none hears.
From within come silent cries
Heard only as the softest sighs.

I am sucked into a whirlwind of blades;
As in the fire of desperation I wade.
There is noway I can escape from this;
For there is nowhere I can find solace.
For though I ever seek the end of these plains,
Nowhere I find comfort from my pains.

I beg you, let me be spared:
Get me out of this nightmare.
End this torment, before it is to late;
For my will is consumed by hate.
There is nothing I can still do
For naught it will lead to.
Any hope is soon dashed,
Its voice forcefully quashed.

In my bowels twists a grisly beast;
On my entrails it greedily feasts.
With fear my stomach is churning
As inside my heart is burning.
In agony I bend double,
As my heart despair gobbles.
For the quiet of the grave it pants
As my soul is swallowed by red ants.

My death is inevitable,
For my very spirit has turned sable.
In terrible tribulation I writhe.
As the Dark Angel raises its scythe.
Into a thousand pieces I sever,
As I still try to retrieve them with fever.
Now, I can no longer be healed,
For my fate is forever sealed.
Willingly I approach my damnation,
As I forsake all hope of salvation.

Bit by bit my mind is decaying.
With its corpse fate is playing.
My life was long left to rot.
When this has begun I forgot.
I can only beg destiny to undo my birth,
To the universe’s boundless mirth.

Within I’ve begun to crumble
Wrecked by my pain’s thunderous rumble.
Soon my sanity is devoured,
And all compassion has soured.
For my heart is torn to shreds,
As my spirit comes hued with reds.
In bitterness I become wrapped,
Inside a body drained and sapped.
My sorrow persists until it seems endless
As I slowly begin my descent into madness.

As I live on in this ordeal,
Everything starts to become unreal.
My life becomes another planet,
As I get stuck in an endless net.
I come to dislike all for which I once had relish
As my world becomes distant and outlandish.
Everything seems extraneous and fey:
Ever becoming farther and farther away.

Hear I lie, consumed by doubt,
Screaming at the universe to be let out.
Here on the floor I lay prone,
While my soul sings helpless moans:
Desperate and prostrate,
I lament the horrors of my fate.

On the cold floor I squirm,
Twisting and wiggling like a wyrm.
In wild convulsions my arms flail,
As I lay here in a teeming hail.
Here in my suffering I welter,
With nowhere to find shelter.

Yet even now, while ‘t is so surreal,
In spite of everything I cannot feel.
At this awareness I gasp in panic,
And my fear becomes almost cosmic.
Yet still I cannot even feel sad.
Now I know for certain - I’ve gone mad.

In fits and starts I twitch,
Thrashing around as if cursed by a witch.
My body writhes in jerks and spasms,
As I’m ever falling into a yawning chasm.
Here on the floor I scream and grovel,
Ever living on in my horrid novel.
There comes no end to this nightmare so grotesque,
For I am forever trapped in the Kafkaesque.