Far from perfect, but I’m trying.
More than a year since the shift.
I’m working to get lost of routine.
Working to get rid of some personal issues.
Trying to think less.
Trying to feel more.
At least focus on the feeling.
Trying to understand how someone else must be feeling if I do this or if I say that
Or why someone does this or why someone says that.
Knowing everyone is struggling.
Everyone is fighting demons.
While many wear a mask, I just don’t.
While I’m silent, there’s a warzone going on inside.
I don’t smile in a moment of battle.
And I ain’t looking for a victim other then me.
I’m man enough to face my previous mistakes.
Man enough to face the mirror
Man enough not to point fingers or making excuses.
Manning up to become the man I’m happy with.
Not for anyone else to be happy with who I became or become, but for me and me only.
Keeping people close that don’t judge me if I fall back once in a while.
but encourage me in the process of growing.
In the proces of learning.
Letting go of the ones that are pointing fingers.
Letting go of the ones that can’t face their own mirror, but have no problem
Judging mine.
I’ve learned that my worst enemy is me.
But the beauty is, I’m on the winning hand.
I’m good.
I used to think that this will help me to become the ‘ perfect’ partner one day.
But I’ve come to notice that I don’t need anyone other then my own company to be happy.
And that I will never be perfect for anyone, just as someone else will never be perfect for me.
But the thing is, I never looked for someone perfect.
Imperfections are just perfectly fine by me.
And ‘someone’ will not be looking for someone perfect to.
Just encourage me while I learn and grow.
And I’ll encourage you.
Don’t fight my insecurities, my inner battles, my grief, my scars.
Cause that’s up to me.
I won’t fight yours either.
But I’ll hold your hand while you fight.
And trust me, I will never let it go.
I’m here to encourage, to trust, to inspire and maybe help the healing.
I ask the same from you, and that’s just plenty.
Show me your vision and I’ll show you mine.
Maybe we can learn from each other and combine it all.
Maybe we can become almost perfect for one another.
Talk to me and I’ll try to understand you.
Talk some more and I’ll understand it better.
I won’t judge your past, I’ll just listen and observe.
Cause in that proces I’ll start knowing how to love you properly.
For now ? I’m holding my own hand.
I encourage myself.
I trust me. I believe in me.
Imperfect. But every day a little less.
And that’s just fine.
I’m good